Wednesday, December 1, 2010

The dark side of the most magical time of the year

Ok, thoughts on Black Friday and working in the mall food court in the Christmas Season.

Before you read further I must tell you that I do enjoy the Christmas season when I am with my family and or friends. Given that it is also a time that schools are on break it is also a chance to see people from high school or church that I generally don’t get a chance to see.

That being said… aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I feel that black Friday is basically summed up in the rambling thoughts below.

  1. I realize that it is 4:30 in the morning, but I didn’t ask you to come to the mall. So drop the attitude.
  2. You want to know the difference between something packaged for here and something to go. Ok, I don’t mind the question, I mind your tone. And I am fairly certain that you could figure it out for yourself.
  3. Yes you are waiting on food. I’d say I’m sorry, but really, I’m not. Not exactly, I mean I did tell you that we were currently serving breakfast. Not my fault you were too stupid to listen and ordered lunch anyway.
  4. Please don’t hit on the staff, they don’t like it.
  5. If you insist on hitting on the staff, and come regularly, please know that we probably have an unflattering nick-name for you.
  6. When you co-workers are tired they will revert to games to entertain themselves. One of these games will involve coming up with nick-names for everyone on the staff.
  7. You think that picking a fight with the people who make your food is a good idea? I guess we shouldn’t do anything too cruel to you… you’re obviously stupid. And that’s not necessarily your fault.
  8. No, the entire menu is not available. Why? Because it is four in the morning. So yes, I am telling you no. Yes you can throw a fit and set a horrible example for your children. I don’t care. You can try to argue with me. I’m still not going to give you what you want. You can try to charm me. It’s not going to get anywhere. I am guessing my shift is longer than your patience, but hey, we’ll see.
  9. I am not saying that I will make you a special order, but I am much more likely to do it for someone who is nice to me. Just a tip. The niceties still go far.
  10. For some reason many people think they are exempt from waiting in line.Waiting for a re-fill. Yes I realize that you have already obviously waited in line once for that drink once and don’t want to a second time. I understand. But it is still rude to everyone else in line. You are still requiring a server to attend to you. So no, slightly off to the side does not mean I will drop everything for the person I am currently waiting on to get whatever it is you want. There’s a line. If you want something from me, wait your turn.Standing at a closed register. You might think that this an original weasel move, believe me it’s not. See, you think I will feel sorry for you because you obviously didn’t know that said register was closed, you were trying to adhere to the system, just misunderstood. Whatever. I’m not buying it. If there are three registers, two have serves behind them and lines in front of them and one does not… then there is a reason and you know it.Old people. I do not mean to be ageist, but old people are always cutting in line.
  11. Yes, I do have all the stuff to make you a vegetarian wrap. But I am not going to. Why not? Because there is a line of about eighteen yards behind you. Oh and because it is not on the menu. I understand you are a vegetarian. I respect that, there are vegetarian items on the menu. Order one of them.
  12. Do not scream at your children in my presence. I will be tempted to call services on you.
  13. Do not scream at your friends and or significant other in my presence. It’s rude.
  14. I don’t care what you say your relationship is with the owners of the store. When they want someone to have a discount they give it to said person themselves. I know this; you probably know this as you probably don’t know the owners at all. So yeah, you’re not getting a discount.Yes, by all means threaten to call cooperate and tell them I’m a horrible employee. Yes, tell my manager next time you see him a church that I didn’t give you and your entire neighborhood free food. You’re right; he’ll probably side with you. I’ll probably lose my job for not allowing you to cheat him out of sixty plus dollars. Oh well, I’ll take my chances.

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